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Blog, Forever Single, Junrix Monter, love, LOVE ADVICE, Motivation, Reason why you're single, Single -

While there are many interesting angles to being married or being committed to someone you cannot negate the benefits of being single. While many people may just want to be a part of a conventional process of being with someone, you don’t have to be like everyone else. Guess what? You can still be incredibly happy while you are single. Go figure. Some people may not understand your position. They don’t understand why being single rocks. Here are 15 reminders of why you are still single. We don’t have the limitations of commitment. We are free to pursue our dreams or goals… and mingle. We do not let go of our identity easily. We would rather find freedom in who we are. We are not ready to settle for less Being single means you are not ready to compromise quality for demand. You simply want to be the person you want to be and get the best of what you deserve. According to a study, when you get married you suddenly are stuck to providing your partner all your attention. So much so that you may lose your association with other friends. When you are single, you bond better with your friends. We have less money worries Every relationship comes with an investment. I mean, you have to financially invest in a relationship. Understandably, you are not having a dual income, but consider all that money you spend on anniversary getaways, dinner dates, buying gifts, and more. Money is always pivotal to the success of any relationship and sometimes the cause of worries between couples. However, as a single person you don’t worry about that. We are more sociable People are attracted to single people and want to socialize with them more. We can invest in ourselves and careers We have the time and energy to focus on our careers rather than getting distracted by marital responsibilities. We sleep better According to research, when you sleep alone you get more sleep, which results in improved cognitive skills and memory. We are not accountable to anyone but ourselves Our finances and whereabouts do not have to be monitored by someone else. We are only accountable to ourselves. We are physically fit Getting married tends to push you to become less conscious about your physique. People who are single are physically fit and are more conscious about their physical appearance. We have no emotional dramas Every relationship comes with a level of compromise. To keep your relationship intact you have to ignore your wishes sometimes and fulfill your partner’s own. We have the time to think about what we want out of life You are not distorted or unclear when you are single. When you are single, you have enough time to think about those things you really want and make smart decisions out of them. You have a better sex life Being in a relationship doesn’t always assure you intimacy. According to statistics, single people actually have a better time in the bedroom – even when intimacy happens about half as frequently. You are less likely to drink when you are solo than when you are married. According to a study, married women consumed more drinks than long-term divorced or recently widowed women. We can play the field You don’t have any reason to feel guilty on a night out, or when you are trying to get yourself a new date. You can explore new and interesting relationships whenever you feel like it. We have more time to do us All that time talking and texting on the phone with a spouse can be used to accomplish other important pursuits instead, like investing that time on yourself.

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Blog, love, RELATIONSHIP, Struggle, Trials -

If someone you love is having a tough time right now, there are some things that you can remind them of which will help them trough their difficulties. Whatever you say to someone who is struggling, the most important thing is to ensure your tone of voice and demeanor is appropriate. Remind your loved one of the following things in a warm, encouraging way, and not in a “pull your socks up” way. Your approach will make all the difference to the response you get. 1. It’s OK Not to Be OK When people are struggling, they often make themselves feel worse by placing unrealistic expectations on themselves. They beat themselves up for having a problem and feeling unable to cope with it. Remind your loved one that they are no less of a person just because they are facing something challenging right now. You love them and will support them in good times and bad. 2. You’re Not Alone Identifying with the person who is struggling can help them feel better. They realize, then, that they are not bearing the weight of the world alone. Remind them that others have had this problem, and that they already have found a way through it. Just knowing that they are not alone can help them feel less lonely and more hopeful. Encourage your loved one to join a support group or forum if appropriate. 3. Let Go of Blame Sometimes when people are struggling, they either want to blame themselves or other people for their circumstances. It’s OK to initially express anger and frustration, but wallowing in feelings of unfairness or blame will make them feel worse and wastes their energy. Help your loved one to see that the way out their difficulties is in looking for solutions and not in assigning blame or hanging onto angry feelings. 4. Struggles Make You Stronger Wisdom, strength and resilience can all be built from the foundations of tough times. Help your loved one to see how they’re growing as a person, even if they feel like they’re going through hell. It’s so important not to be glib  or patronizing when you’re saying this ‒ actually tell your loved one the new strengths you see in them. 5. Take a Step Back People going through tough times often lose perspective, because they feel so mired in the problem itself. Reminding someone to step back from the situation can help them to see things in a fresh light, and will help them find new solutions. 6. Nothing Lasts Forever The terrible thing about really tough times is that they feel like they will go on forever. But, in reality, nothing lasts forever ‒ not even the most horrible emotions or the direst circumstances. Reminding your loved one of this can help them gain perspective and feel comforted at the same time. 7. Take Things Step By Step Tough times can often bring complex and confusing feelings, and those who are struggling may feel paralyzed and unable to make decisions. Remind them that they don’t have to solve the whole problem at once. If they just do the next right thing, they will start to make progress. 8. Look For The Open Door When life shuts one door, another one will always open. Losing something will always lead to new opportunities, but only if you are open to them. Remind your loved one to stay alert to fresh opportunities and solutions. 9. Just Do Your Best People who are struggling can put so much pressure on themselves to get things right that they feel even more upset when they don’t meet their own unrealistic expectations. Remind them that as long as they just do their best, that’s all that matters. They are human, after all. Their best is good enough. 10. You’ve Come Through Tough Times Before If someone you love is having a hard time, it may be difficult for them to see their strengths. Reminding them that they have already survived tough times before can show them that there is an end in sight, and that they have the strength to reach it. 11. You’re Brave Most people who are struggling refuse to acknowledge how strong and brave they actually are. They may see themselves as weak and scared. Remind them that courage is not the absence of fear. It’s the willingness to go on even when you’re afraid. 12. There Is Something Good in Each Day Going through difficulties can lead to a negative mindset. If someone is really going through a desperately hard time, and dealing with something like depression, being all happy-clappy with them won’t work. But do ask them about the good things in their life, what has gone well, and what they have achieved. It will help them to see a glimmer of hope, even in the darkness. 13. Look at What You’re Gaining Even when someone has a difficult problem, there will always be an upside to it. Whether it’s finding out who their true friends are when they’re struggling, or having the opportunity to develop patience, strength and problem-solving abilities, there will always be a silver lining. Help your loved one to find it. 14. It’s Not Your Fault Sometimes when people are struggling, they take their problems very personally, almost believing that their difficulties are sent in some way to punish them. If your loved one is doing this, reminding them that it’s not their fault can help them feel relieved. 15. Well Done Validating someone for their efforts when they’re having a miserable time can make a big difference in their day. If someone is struggling, they may not acknowledge their own hard work. Giving them praise can help them feel rewarded and appreciated.. 16. Focus on Now Often people make their tough times even tougher by worrying about the future or fretting about the past. They may add to their misery by letting themselves think back to all the times life has treated them badly or that they’ve failed before; or they may fear that their current difficulty will lead to yet more problems. Remind them to focus on now, because that’s the only part of the story they can change at the moment. 17. Nothing Is Ever the End of the World Very few problems, however big or small, can actually stop you from breathing. You can encourage your loved one by reminding them that everything is survivable and beatable. They will find a way of dealing with this issue, however tough, if only they keep trying. 18. Be Kind To Yourself When someone is going through a hard time, they may feel so frustrated by their problems that they resort to beating themselves up or not allowing themselves a minute of reprieve from the issue. Remind your loved one that tough times are easier when we’re kind to ourselves. They are allowed “time off” from their problem to have a laugh, treat themselves, and be around good people. Relieving stress can actually help them to come back to the problem refreshed and recharged. 19. People Want to Help If your loved one is suffering, they may believe that they have to go through it all by themselves. They may not want to burden others with their problems, and won’t want to ask for help. Remind them that most people are amenable to helping; in fact, helping feels good. The reason people have different strengths is precisely so that they can help each other. Encourage your loved one to seek extra help should they need it. 20. I’m There For You The strength of these words can not be underestimated. Letting your loved one know that you’re there for them, and that you will listen to their feelings, dry their tears, or even just be around, can mean everything to someone going through hell. Just being a non-judgmental, caring presence in your loved one’s life can make a massive difference in how they feel and how they cope. Like this article ? Share it with your friends. 

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Blog, Inggit, Inggitira, Tsismosa -

Ipinanganak tayong hindi pare-pareho. Sa kulay, itsura, talento, talino at pag-uugali. Hindi rin pantay-pantay ang ating pamumuhay. May mayaman, mayroon din mahirap. May mga taong kilala, mayroon din naman hindi. Masuwerte ka kung ipinanganak kang mayaman. Pero kung ikaw ay pinanganak na mahirap, huwag mong sabihin na malas ka. Kasi gaganda naman ang buhay ng kahit na sino basta magsumikap ka lang. Sa paligid mo ngayon marami kang makikita na hindi maganda. At kabilang na diyan ang pag-uugali ng tao. May mabait, mayroon ding nagbabait-baitan lang. Mayroong akala mo totoo, pero kapag nakaharap ka lang. Kunwari dadamayan ka, pero pag nadapa ka na, iiwanan ka na lang basta. May mga tao talaga na walang ibang magawa kundi pagmasdan ang iyong mga ginagawa. Sundan ka kung saan ka pupunta. Lalo na pag kilala at sikat ka. Akala mo tagahanga mo sila. Pero hindi, kasi kaya ka lang nila sinusundan at pinagmamasdan dahil humahanap sila ng butas at pagkakataon para gawin kang masama. Hindi porke’t mas maganda na ang buhay mo kaysa sa kanya, dahilan na para siraan ka niya. Dito sa mundo, maraming pakialamero at pakialamera. Mga hindi kuntento sa sariling buhay nila. Papasukin pa ang buhay ng iba. Okay sana kung maganda ang pakay nila, pero hindi dahil sisiraan ka. Akala mo totoo siya, kapag nakatalikod ka may sinasabi palang masama. Akala mo, kaibigan mo, maaasahan at mapagkakatiwalaan. Pero kapag wala ka, siya ang bida at inaapak-apakan ka niya nang hindi mo nalalaman. May mga tao na walang alam tignan kundi kung ano ang mayroon ka na wala sila. Kung sino at ano ka, kung nasaan ka na. Magaling magkumpara at magaling magkuwenta. At kapag nakita niya na gumaganda ang buhay mo, sumisikat o kahit ano pa, hihilain ka naman niya pababa. Ayaw niyang maging masaya ka. Ayaw niyang umaangat ka kaya abala siya sa paninira. Bakit kaya ganun ang mga ugali ng inggitero at inggitera? Imbes na magsumikap sila para maabot at marating kung anong mayroon ka, mas gusto nilang siraan ka. Ano bang napapala nila sa paninira? Wala diba? Nagsasayang lang sila ng panahon sa mga bagay na wala namang kuwenta. Kung ginugol na lang sana nila ang mga oras ng paninira nila sa ‘yo sa mas makabuluhang gawain, mas mabuti pa. Lumalala, sumasama. Hindi na maganda para sa mga batang lumalaki at sa mga isisilang pa. Ang ugaling ito ay hindi magandang tularan nila. Kaya habang maaga pa dapat mag-isip-isip ka na. Kung mayroong dapat baguhin sa iyong sarili, baguhin mo na.

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attitude, Blog, complaining, lesson -

Let me introduce you to a “friend”. He has the habit of complaining – just about every stuff! Sadly, I am one of those who he complain about. And worse, I have the habit of sticking around despite his mussing. Just this day, the “complaining episode” strikes again. It was too hard for me to deal with, but as every day goes, I found myself talking with him along with another “friend”. As he was talking, I found something interesting about this person. I realized that the hate he bears for others would actually mirror the love he has for himself. As ironic as it seems, I found great lessons from him: Do not trash talk. You never know how far these words can hurt someone. Think before you speak. This may sound like a cliche but its a great thing to practice if you don’t like waking up one day and realizing that a good friend won’t talk to you anymore. Learn to deal with your own insecurities. Before you start wishing that others can change their attitudes, start changing your own first.  Look around and find people who cares for you. Appreciate when you are on the verge of complaining.  Get some self-control.  Think happy thoughts. There are just so much in life to be happy about, start looking for them. Write or draw when you are angry. Just do something that will destruct you from your current situation. Get help. People who are ready to lend a crying shoulder are everywhere. You can even find them online. Join forums and support groups. Knowing that you can relate to others will help you find courage in the situation you are dealing with.  Learn to love yourself.

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Blog, forgive, FORGIVENESS, happiness, Junrix Monter, love -

To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness. I once read a book on forgiveness which shared this powerful idea. It said that whenever we refuse to forgive someone, the person we are not forgiving is really ourselves. It makes sense doesn’t it? When you feel angry/bitter toward someone, it’s not the other person who is carrying the anger and bitterness. It’s you. For what it’s worth, the other person is probably not aware of how you are feeling toward him/her. You are the only person carrying the baggage around. On a deeper level, I believe you are angry/bitter at yourself for allowing yourself to be hurt by this person. This was what happened to me. Carrying all these heavyweight emotions can be very tiring. It’s like while dragging a whole pile of carcasses wherever you go. I’m sure you feel tired emotionally and mentally from the episode. You can’t get anywhere far if you keep dragging them along. To forgive him/her, first forgive yourself. Think about how you are denying yourself of so much happiness by holding on to your grievances. Think about how you are preventing yourself from experiencing your real love because you are still hanging on to these baggage. Whenever you hold on to something, you prevent yourself from receiving new things in life. Forgive yourself for putting yourself through this trauma. Forgive yourself for everything that has happened. As you forgive yourself, forgiveness of the other person will occur naturally.

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